i was watching a number of “Sex In The City” episodes (i’m a late blooming fan. it was the movie that got me hooked.) & i’ve come 2 realize that i don’t have too many good, reliable friends. i don’t have too many on-call friend as to where i can throw a shimdig & have a large amount of friends come who don’t mind being around eachother. maybe it’s the media getting 2 me, but i’m ticked.
then i also came to realize that people my age, well, the people i know, suck. i could try to throw a nice party, but if they think it’s going 2 be boring (which it wouldn’t), they won’t show . & that’s what makes a party boring, no shows. the people i associate myself w/ don’t understand that pretty much, life is what u make it. if somebody invites a person 2 a party, the only way the parties going 2 be fun is if he or she contributes to the funness of the party. so if u go there sitting on ur ass, expecting somebody to take care of u, it ain’t gonna happen. people are always looking 4 the life of the party 2 make the party live. you be the life of the party. imagine if every person @ a party would take responsibility for the liveliness of that party, that shit would be effin’ bomb. greatest parties of all parties.
i vexed about the fact that people will dismiss shit that they have complete control over or complain about something they have control over. it doesn’t make since to pass up on something that u have control over. i was reading this blog & i ran across this great quote, i forgot who it’s by but it went something like this:
”livin’ is so magnificient. stop dreamin’ it.”
people are so caught up in dreams of how life should go & how it should be lived & saving shit 4 later that they’re not really living life & then it passes them up. then comes the depression. people are the worse. i’m just going 2 leave this post off w/ this:
”life is what u make it.”
Filed under: jfk's life. | Tags: california, Economy, inglewood, Life, Los Angeles, People, Self Interest, Selfishness, Selfless
well.
people function on self interest.
i’ve never met a selfless person.
never is a strong word.
people are indeed the worse.
but the best is the worse.
just like all family u love them 2 death, but after living with them for a certain amount of years, they’re going 2 do shit 2 piss u off from time 2 time. my brother probably wouldn’t have made me as mad if i wasn’t so bored right now. & all i can do is think obsessive thoughts & wonder what everyone else is doing.
i think that i’m just ready 2 be more independent, as to where i can have my own space. so when i come home i can clear my mind & deal with my things. & nothing will be occupied because they’re my things.
ugh!! i want more!!
Filed under: jfk's life. | Tags: Boys, Confusion, Discombobulated, Life, Men, Nostalgia
i wish i could say i am satisfied, but i’m not. i can’t wait until that day comes, when i’m satified.
i feel hung up.
twisted up.
discombobulated.
nostalgic.
it’s bittersweet.
& i’m sick of the bitter side so i’m just going 2 ignore it. then everything would seem sweeter.
that’s the remedy, ignorance.
ignorance is bliss.
gaaawd.
Filed under: jfk's life., poetry. | Tags: Construction, Destruction, Distance, Friendship, Hammer, Life, Love
there’s a wall between us.
where is the motherfucking hammer
i’m tearing it down.
Filed under: jfk's life., random. | Tags: Anxiety, Life, Money, Sex, Stress

i feel like there’s still niggas that owe me checks
i feel like there’s still niggas that owe me sex
i feel like this but niggas don’t know the stress.
Filed under: jfk's life., photography, things i like. | Tags: Black & White, Black And White, Black And White Photography, Burger King, LACMA, Life, Lights, Metro, Photos, Pico
i’m getting the hang of cam’ron (my camera).










#1
the hands on the clock
i wish someone would break them
breath would be easy
#2
ur sky is dark grey
ur raining on my parade
wish i was the sun
Filed under: jfk's life., poetry. | Tags: Confidence, Ego, Hearts, Life, Machines, Self-Esteem
Egos are like hearts that can’t pump for themselves
The only way to stay alive is to be boosted from someone else
The heart that depends completely on the machine will fail
Which in my case is cool because dead men are in no need of & tell no tales.
Filed under: jfk's life., poetry. | Tags: Clairvoyance, Happiness, Instincts, Intuition, Life
dear clair
u make my gut loses it’s tact
i wish u would trust my logic
& cease the uneasy tension in my back
& the feeling of lethargy
u exhaust me
u emotive Clair
my decisions preserves us
u are ungrateful & boisterous
i wish i could go numb
i hate the shit out of u
because ur so naive
i like the way ur heart makes u think u can achieve
sometimes u make me proud
i find it hard 2 trust u
ur opinions are sometimes off bound
ur growth, i want 2 rush u
& five year old Clair
i know ur only trying to help
u want to fill the void w/ fun
happiness takes stealth
& i rather feel the void w/ none
& i wish u would trust my logic
& cease my destructive thoughts
because my logic’s always right
& what u left will have me lost
& thoughtless at ur cost
cuz i can't work a job